Oh Elon! You DOGED Yourself.

Tesla Stock Is In The ICU - Code Blue!

In the cold light of Tesla's first quarter earnings report, the mythology surrounding Elon Musk lies shattered like the promises he once made to eager investors. The numbers tell a story that no amount of Twitter bluster can obscure. A 71% profit collapse year-over-year. A stock price that has hemorrhaged half its value since mid-December. Global sales in free fall, down 13% compared to the same period last year.

The company once heralded as the future of transportation now survives on financial life support, not from its revolutionary products, but from $400 million in interest income and $595 million harvested from regulatory credits – the very environmental policies Musk's political allies have sworn to dismantle. Without these government-created credits, Tesla's profitability vanishes like morning fog in the Nevada desert where taxpayers gifted Musk $1.3 billion for his Gigafactory.

What happened to the Tesla that captured America's imagination? The innovative spirit departed when F…